Dad Shoots Daughters Laptop on Youtube after she posts Rant

[pukie]

The lefties are starting to show themselves in this thread.

[Bubbles1993]

The lefties are starting to show themselves in this thread.

That's me for sure. Card carryin' commie

[pukie]

The lefties are starting to show themselves in this thread.

That's me for sure. Card carryin' commie

That's funny. I never mentioned any names.

[Bubbles1993]

The lefties are starting to show themselves in this thread.

That's me for sure. Card carryin' commie

That's funny. I never mentioned any names.

I know.

I just don't see how anyone views on one incident can give too much insight into their political views. I find this forum increasingly tries to label someone left or right and then discount their opinion because of it. I don't think issues are that simple. Your post reminded me of that. My response could have been better articulated I suppose but at least I didn't shoot my laptop.

[Mr. Islander]

.

[Toonces]

I gotta say, I can completely relate to dad. Completely. 100%. I've been there. The only difference is I didn't want to alienate my husband and his family by acting as this girl's father did - which I know would've happened.

Every day I wonder why the fuck we bought her that goddamn computer. I deluded myself into thinking she'd use it for school work. Parents of kids, don't make the mistake of buying your kid a laptop! One central family computer is fine.

Interestingly, the father now completely regrets his choice to make that video. He regrets all the attention it grabbed.

[Hired Goon]

I agree with his reasoning, and commend him for setting limits. But there were better ways to get his point across.

Since kids often emulate behaviour, look at a couple of the underlying messages:
-In this family, they don't talk stuff out, they ambush each other with online flame wars.
-When we're upset at each other, it's ok to trash property.

He shouldn't be too surprised when he's come home in the future to find she's trashed the TV because she was pissed. There was very little to be learned through this about respect or boundaries.

And I whole heartedly agree that he's the adult here so should have kept it in house. His behaviour was just as childish in the end and really will do nothing to make her a better person. He escalated the cycle they've had. I'd be surprised if her next action was anything but more outlandish at some point.

[48highlander]

I agree with his reasoning, and commend him for setting limits. But there were better ways to get his point across.

Since kids often emulate behaviour, look at a couple of the underlying messages:
-In this family, they don't talk stuff out, they ambush each other with online flame wars.
-When we're upset at each other, it's ok to trash property.

He shouldn't be too surprised when he's come home in the future to find she's trashed the TV because she was pissed. There was very little to be learned through this about respect or boundaries.

And I whole heartedly agree that he's the adult here so should have kept it in house. His behaviour was just as childish in the end and really will do nothing to make her a better person. He escalated the cycle they've had. I'd be surprised if her next action was anything but more outlandish at some point.

Have any of you actually gone on to his facebook to read his follow up posts? He had tried other/softer/kinder methods, apparently they didn't stick with the kid. So he one upped it. Now according to him (and you are free to dismiss, but I don't think he is going to lie given all the attention this is getting), is daughter has accepted what happened, clearly not happy losing the laptop, but realized she f'ed up and was taking her parents for granted. At least she knows that her dad isn't one to make idle empty threats. How many of us have seen/experienced parents who threaten to discipline their kid only to either not follow through, or simply cave in.

[Hired Goon]

Have any of you actually gone on to his facebook to read his follow up posts?

Yep.

He had tried other/softer/kinder methods, apparently they didn't stick with the kid. So he one upped it.

Understood that kinder gentler didn't work. They funny thing about kids, especially teens, is that they will push your limits, and will defy you and drive you crazy. Most likely repeatedly. Parenting is not about "one upping". What's next for this guy? Will he be forced to set fire to her car if she comes home after curfew to "one up" it?

Now according to him (and you are free to dismiss, but I don't think he is going to lie given all the attention this is getting), is daughter has accepted what happened, clearly not happy losing the laptop, but realized she f'ed up and was taking her parents for granted.

I have no doubt that he's telling the truth, that his daughter is straightened up.....for now. She's 16, she's got a few years of screwing up, rebelling, and making hurtful statements to her parents. Doesn't make her a bad kid, just a teen. Where does he go from here then? If he's gotta blast stuff whenever he's at the end of his rope to make a point, it's gonna be a loooong set of teen years for him. If it turns out that she straightens up permanently, then fantastic. But that would likely be to the rest of his parenting. He seems like a good dude when you read his other posts. He says that this 8 minutes is not his best example of parenting. And I think that would have a HUGE chance of causing unintended consequences if used on most teens.

At least she knows that her dad isn't one to make idle empty threats. How many of us have seen/experienced parents who threaten to discipline their kid only to either not follow through, or simply cave in.

Agree on that. Good that he set boundaries and followed through. Not enough of that in this country. Like was mentioned earlier, give the computer to someone less fortunate, if you really think she shouldn't have it. Shows a good message about boundaries, and not to destroy stuff when we are upset. Or lock it away and have her earn it back.

And I don't think that he's a bad guy like many on his FB have posted. He was just a frustrated dad. I've got kids and there are days I feel like shooting stuff up too. I just don't think that what he did was the best way it could have been handled. The main issue I have with the video is that it doesn't actually model the behaviour he wants in his kid. Which is SUPER important in parenting. One thing that kids are quick to call you on is "do as I say, not as I do."

I stand by that it was childish on his part. She posted a rant on the Web, so he posted a rant on the web, he took the same course of action and spoke in the same manner as his child, hence, acting like his child...childish. He's even posted on his website that some of the stuff he said to his daughter was disrespectful and he wouldn't have posted it if he had to do it again, as it's been hurtful to his daughter. And the fact that it's on the web means it's out there forever. He regrets that he can't take it down. He did what every parent FEELS like doing.

No parent is perfect, I just think that calling him a "hero" like many have done is a little extreme and sends some mixed messages about handling yourself as a parent.

[Hired Goon]

Ok. That was a bit long.

The short version.

When I go to calls where parents are pissed at their kids, I generally give them advice OTHER THAN shooting up their kids' stuff.......

[Pierre-Marc Larocque]

Interesting,

Reminds me when I was about 9-10 and had a cap gun that looked exactly like my Dad's service revolver. Even after being told that I shouldn't be pointing that thing at others, my dad caught me pointing it at our neighbour's direction (I don't even think our neighbour noticed).

I still remember sitting there as dad took the toy gun and placed it in the bench-vise and broke into pieces with a hammer. While I've done many, many stupid things since then, I've learned that a) do something stupid and you'll get caught; and, b) there are consequences to not following the rules.

[HwyBear]

Every day I wonder why the fuck we bought her that goddamn computer. I deluded myself into thinking she'd use it for school work. Parents of kids, don't make the mistake of buying your kid a laptop! One central family computer is fine..

take it to an IT tech and have the modem and WiFi stuff removed, no more internet!

[Sly]

I would like to commend him on choosing to use a 1911 to destroy the girls laptop.

I also like the fact, right or wrong that he isn't coddling his child....to many parents do that these days.

[Toonces]

Every day I wonder why the fuck we bought her that goddamn computer. I deluded myself into thinking she'd use it for school work. Parents of kids, don't make the mistake of buying your kid a laptop! One central family computer is fine..

take it to an IT tech and have the modem and WiFi stuff removed, no more internet!

You missed the part where I said I was just a stepmom and have no say.

[48highlander]

Every day I wonder why the fuck we bought her that goddamn computer. I deluded myself into thinking she'd use it for school work. Parents of kids, don't make the mistake of buying your kid a laptop! One central family computer is fine..

take it to an IT tech and have the modem and WiFi stuff removed, no more internet!

You missed the part where I said I was just a stepmom and have no say.

Depending on your home network setup, you could just block all internet traffic/limit access times to your kid's computer, through the router settings. No need to touch her actual computer